The Story of Two Strangers
I once led a small group of doctors from the west to tour different parts of the middle east. We managed to visit at least Middle Eastern countries and managed to treat over 10k patient. All free of charge. How amazing is that? Towards the end of the day, just as the doctors were getting ready to pack their stuff and leave, Ahmed approached me. He had a question but did not know how to ask it directly. So as always, we discussed family, faith, and life. After hours of conversations, he leaned in and asked, “Why do Westerners always have a hidden agenda?”
That question confused me. Why would he ask that when it’s obvious that these doctors wanted to help people? Well, because the area had negative past experience, and his questions echoes a sentiment held by many in the region. While Westerners may see themselves as friendly and well-intentioned, deep-seated historical, political, and cultural reasons fuel skepticism. As a Christian missionary, you are not very different in the eyes of many in the middle east. If you want to build trust in the Middle East, you must understand the roots of this distrust and actively work to overcome it.
Why Middle Easterners Distrust Westerners
1. Colonial History and Political Betrayals
For centuries, Middle Eastern countries have suffered under colonial rule and foreign intervention. Britain and France carved up the region after World War I, dividing lands and making promises they never intended to keep. Later, American-backed coups and military interventions deepened resentment. Many still view Westerners through the lens of these betrayals, assuming that outside interests always come with a price.
2. Western Media Bias
The way the Middle East is portrayed in Western media only reinforces negative perceptions. Many locals feel that their cultures, religions, and political struggles are misrepresented or vilified. Westerners are often seen as either ignorant of the truth or complicit in spreading false narratives. When Westerners arrive with their own assumptions, rather than a willingness to listen, trust is eroded before relationships even begin.
3. Cultural Misunderstandings
Western values—such as individualism, directness, and efficiency—sometimes clash with Middle Eastern values of community, honor, and relational depth. What a Westerner sees as honesty may be viewed as rudeness; what a Westerner perceives as efficiency might feel cold and impersonal. These cultural differences create barriers, making Westerners seem insensitive or self-serving.
4. Religious Tensions
Christianity and Islam have a long and complicated history. While most Middle Easterners are hospitable and open to discussion, they are also deeply aware of Western missionary movements and fear cultural imperialism. Many suspect that Westerners—especially Christians—come with the goal of changing their way of life, rather than genuinely engaging with them.
How to Overcome This Distrust
1. Lead with Humility, Not Superiority
The Middle East values honor and respect. If you come in as a “teacher” rather than a “learner,” you will confirm the suspicion that Westerners think they are superior. Instead, be willing to listen, ask questions, and admit when you don’t understand something.
2. Build Relationships Before Sharing Ideas
Trust in the Middle East is built over tea, long conversations, and shared meals. If you rush into discussions about politics, religion, or business before establishing a genuine friendship, you will be met with resistance. Slow down. Invest in people, not just projects.
3. Acknowledge Historical Wounds
Many Westerners get defensive when confronted with accusations about colonialism or political interference. Instead of arguing, acknowledge the pain of the past. Saying, “I understand why you feel that way, and I’m here to listen, not to push an agenda,” can go a long way in breaking down walls.
4. Respect Cultural and Religious Sensitivities
Know the cultural and religious boundaries. Dress modestly, learn local greetings, and avoid discussions that could be perceived as attacks on Islam or Arab identity. Showing cultural respect demonstrates that you value people beyond just your own worldview.
5. Be a Person of Your Word
One of the fastest ways to gain trust is through integrity. Many in the Middle East have seen too many broken promises from Western governments, corporations, and even individuals. If you say you will do something, do it. Follow through, even on small commitments, and your reliability will set you apart.
6. Embrace Hospitality and Generosity
Middle Eastern culture places a high value on hospitality. Accept invitations into homes, enjoy the food offered to you, and reciprocate generosity when you can. Kindness, warmth, and a willingness to share life’s simple joys break down suspicion far more effectively than words ever could.
Final Thoughts: Trust Is Earned, Not Assumed
If you are a Westerner seeking to engage in the Middle East—whether for missions, business, or cultural exchange—remember that trust is not given freely. It must be earned through patience, respect, and genuine relationships.
Ahmed’s question—”Why do Westerners always have a hidden agenda?”—was not an accusation, but an invitation. An invitation to prove, through consistent love and integrity, that not all Westerners fit the stereotype.
The Basin and Towel 